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September 08, 2015

13 Totally Bizarre But REAL North American Laws – This is Nuts!

1. An old Toronto bylaw makes it illegal to drag a dead horse down Yonge Street on Sundays. So wait until Monday if you need to drag your dead horses, please.
2. In Georgia, make sure your child is at least 13 years of age before selling them to the circus. Otherwise you might face criminal charges and a $1,000 fine. The fine amount makes it not worth the trouble – what if your kid only sells for like 850 bucks?
3. Apparently it’s illegal to sell your eyeballs in Texas. Dang it! I was counting on the lucrative eyeball market down South to help pay for my student loans.

4. According to City Ordinance Number 352 in Pacific Grove, California, it is a misdemeanor to kill or threaten a butterfly. Would you be screwed if the butterfly threatened you first though?
5. It’s illegal to whistle after 11pm in Petrolia, Ontario. According to Article 3, 772.3.6 on the town’s website, “Yelling, shouting, hooting, whistling or singing is prohibited…” Keep it down will ya?
6. You can be arrested or fined for harassing bigfoot, according to Washington state. He’s a sensitive guy, so don’t hurt his feelings.
7. In Indiana, it’s illegal to attend a public event or use public transport within 4 hours of eating onions or garlic. This one has a touch of logic to it, at least. If you smell like garlic, stay away from me.
8. In Utah, You can ONLY get married to your cousin if you are both older than 65. Seriously people, do we need to be told this? Young cousin spouses are gross.
9. In Gainesville, Georgia, it is actually illegal to eat fried chicken with anything other than your fingers. You pretentious hipsters need to stop insisting on using new-fangled inventions like “cutlery”.

10. Are you a one-armed piano player? If so, don’t go to Utah. One-armed piano players must perform for free in that state.
11. It is illegal to sell peanuts in Lee County, Alabama after sundown on a Wednesday.
12. You must not have an ice cream cone in your back pocket at any time in Alabama. Crazy hoodlums are stuffing their pockets with cones all the time these days; it makes me sick.
13. It is considered an offense to push a live moose out of a moving airplane in Alaska. It is also considered an offense to feed alcoholic beverages to a moose in Fairbanks, Alaska. I didn’t know there were so many moose-related ways to break the law…

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